Thursday, August 23, 2012

Thursday's Monkey Butt: New Delhi

29 Nov 1932 - Two Month Old Baby Carried away while sleeping.  A very large monkey crept into the room of the sleeping child and carried it away.  The parents noticed a few minutes later the monkey in the tree fondling the child like it was one of its own. The monkey went from tree to tree with the child, with the crowd on it's trail.  ....  source

Insanity right? Why are you sharing this MB?  Well let me just tell you...   Last week we went to dinner with Mr MB's parents and of course there is always that person you just know you can't stand. I mean had I been drinking, she would have had a horrible night, because I'm sure I would have made fun of her voice. TO HER FACE!  She had one of those annoying voices.  Go ahead imagine the most annoying voice..Got it?  Now that's what she sounded like.

I had the  pleasure of sitting at the same table as her, listening to her talk...watching her facial expressions and it made me want to reach across the table. Still, I can't understand  her.....   I just can't understand why she talked like that or would make faces like that.  WHY?

But I'm straying from the subject, I'm not trying to convince you that this bitch drove me nuts the whole time at dinner...
I did catch on to some talk she was having with someone else at the table about monkeys. Now you know me, when someone starts talking about monkeys, my ears perk up and they've my full attention, whether they know it or not, that doesn't matter... I was focused!

I could hear her tale from a trip to New Delhi, now I've no real knowledge on New Delhi, so I did what a Monkey Butt could do and relied on Google to help me with this task...

New Delhi is the capital of India, love their food.   Found that much out for sure, so that gives me a footing anyway. So thought I would dig deeper and see what if any news I could find regarding monkeys... 

Her story was a blah blah blah about how terrified she was of such and such and such and then she got to the goods. She tells us that in New Delhi the monkeys are a protected animal and that it's a common thing for them to creep into the child's bedroom and steal them away...What they do with the child, she had no answer for..

You don't think them... Do you?

So I couldn't  help but look it up, because you know me... I just gotta know. Sadly I couldn't find anything other than that you read at the top. There is plenty of posts however that New Delhi does have a serious monkey problem.  Monkey's that will steal away your food, from your hands and even take candy from a baby. 

WE all know those monkey's can be real turd flingers. 

So just goes to show, how often you come across people who are just ignorant or full of shit.. Possibly gullible or something like that.  I won't see her again, but I'd love to call her out on it.  That's mean...

Hang  in there!


  1. First: when you said think of the most annoying voice ever, all I could hear was Fran Drescher's voice.
    So, thanks for that.
    Then, when I read about New Delhi, all I could think about was that was a good place to get a great pastrami sandwich. Because, that OLD deli just sucked.

  2. See, if you tie the ends of this story together, you get the complete package. Your "dining companion" konws all about monkeys stealing babies because she was STOLEN by monkeys as a baby. This would explain the voice and face characteristics. See how neat that works?

  3. You should have called Bullshit right then and there! Or maybe coughed it into your mouth while looking away.

  4. The old saying still rings true, "you can't fix stupid". We do walk among them Sweet Thang. Have an awesome Friday and weekend.


Dingleberry says: