Sounds like one of those grown up stores, you know the ones. The walls covered in shelves of naughty books, movies and toys. I've ventured into a few of these in my lifetime. I don't know what it is, but it's terrifying really. I get terribly uncomfortable in those places... Anyone else? It's just me isn't it?
Maybe you're thinking... Plant X cafe? Located on Rehoboth Beach in Delaware. This place looks frakin FANTASTIC! For some reason I think a reader of mine may be lives in Delaware? Or Perhaps family there? If so have you or they tried this place? The house is to die for. I want to paint my house like this one!!
Or what about Planet X family fun center? Ya can find this place in Cedar Rapids, IA. Anyone take the family for a little Planet X? I'm curious, is this one a lot like most others, Dave and Busters? Funopolis?
Nope dear Dingleberries, I'm not talking about fun centers, sex shops or cafes. I'm talking about this jazz I'm hearing today. For those who aren't sure, my definition of Jazz is a lot like that of bullshit. Just so we're all clear here. I'm calling this planet x bullshit. OK?
My dear friend, M texts me today. It's been more than a week since I last talked to him. Still glad he's back in the great state of GA though. So he text me today and tells me
M: "I saw that planet I've been talking about at sun set yesterday. It's really hard to see because it's right under the sun and you gotta look directly in the sun, so the only way you can see it is if a small cloud is over the sun."
MB: "and I forgot the name of it already"
*Really and truly I'm dying laughing, like oh my god I know what he's talking about, but I really can't remember the name of this "planet" thats aimed for the earth to kill us all. Here we go! Keep in mind, I love this fella, he's one of my favorite people, one of my bestest friends when he isn't off his rocker! He does that from time to time..
M: " Planet X "
So me, of course I get myself into the Google, because like I said I know where he's going with it. So off to Google I go... I find a few articles, some things posted that I know think just like him. I'm looking for something that say's the opposite, just the get a rile out of him.
MB: "lemme see.... Google tells me it's a doomsday scare tactic. This other site tells me it's way past Pluto. Ya can't see that one silly! "
*basically trying to tell M that according to the recent news, it's not something that they have ever even seen. I doubt we'd be able to see it either.
I then proceed to tell him "Stop looking at the sun silly!" so here's where it gets good, here's my favorite part, when I'm able to get him into one of his good rants that he goes into from time to time. They're really quite thought provoking at times, if they weren't so far fetched! Maybe they aren't, who am I to judge!
M: "nah it's real. Saturn has tilted 90 degrees on it's axis and Venus has changed color. The government doesn't want this out cause it will start a pandemic. But it's not that far, I promise you. Also, Nasa is evacuating the space station bySeptember and they have to let the hubble telescope go and it will crash to earth soon. Youtube planet X and watch some of those videos."
Now I don't know about you all, but I'm worred a little. Thinking oh shit what's dis white boy talking about today!!
MB: "Sounds like a conspiracy to me, BASTARDS!"
*yes I know I've a silly sense of humor. Anyone else see that movie Conspiracy Theory? There was so crazy shit going on in that movie!!!
Oh don't think he stops there, no he keeps going with this one, it's good stuff, read on...
M: " Also the government has made Google Earth crop out a rectangle in the sky. Where this system is and nobody in American can see it on Google Sky. SO of course they're going to say it's not real. Because then they would have to explain why.... The conspiracy is telling everyone it's not REAL"
MB: ::yawns:: "That's crazy"
M: "I know right!!!"
*Look away while I say this next line....
MB: "Sounds like the government though..."
*Sidenote, don't misunderstand.. I don't think our government is full of lies and conspiracies or anything ::cough cough::
M: "Nasa built an observatory on the south pole just for watching this... and it's not just a planet, it's a whole solar system."
*He has a way of keeping on and keeping on, I'm trying to keep up. Trying not to switch off and ever so rudely change the subject on him, because I'm bored. The kind part of me just sees that my friend needs to rant about. I'm a good friend aren't I?
MB: "We just have to hang on and pray"
I went on later to tell him that Bruce WIllis will save us. I love that guy, he's kicks much ass, well he did back in the day. I think he can hop aboard and blow the thing off it's route and save the planet. What do you think ?
I love my friends but sometimes they come up with some of the craziest shit you'll ever hear. Anyone else follow this story? Have any input, deleting me because of my blasphemy? I will miss you when you're gone.
Hang in there!