Random Writings....

So, I've let the thought of writing pass through my noggin on more than once occasion.  So this morning, this is what I've got so far. I'm going to continue to work on this, randomly, I'm seeking critics right now. I know you all are much better writers than me.... 

I shall call it, "The Breakdown" ....

"I cried today", she muttered almost to quietly for me to hear.  "Did I just hear you say you CRIED today?", I said to her with as much sincerity as I could muster out. I never understood completely her constant instability and lack of confidence. How it was oh so easy for her to have a break down. I'd almost moved past my feeling sorry for her, the pity trips, the constant talking, the battle to keep her strong.  It's unbearable at times to cope with someone, someone you love so very dearly, someone with whom your words of reinforcement fall upon  deaf ears. It's troublesome and annoying.  "Honey", I said to her.  "What is the matter?  Why do you allow yourself these tears?  This frustration?  The anger?", "What my dear happened today to inflict the breakdown?"  She only peered at me through what I didn't notice before, as puffy eyes.  I'm gambling she was crying on her way to meet for this lovely breakfast we were having. "Nothing really, I just let go", "The moment of anger, weakness, I broke down.", she knows it's uncalled for, I thought to myself. She knows it's not good for those around her, those less strong, those weaker than she, to see what she is doing.  To witness her lacking the strength it takes, the strength of a thousand mothers to strong arm their way and make things the way they should be. To take control of the situation.  I understand it is a hard job being a mother. The sole purpose of that little persons life and to educate and watch them grow. It's these times, when I see this woman struggle, it's times like these when I wonder if I myself would go through the same battles, if I'd ever chosen to settle down and have children of my own.  I glance at her, so beautiful, so weak at this moment. I've watched her fight, toe to toe, to win every battle she's ever attempted and these last 6 years of her life, I've watched her crumble. Watched her break down time and time again.  It saddens me.