Day 174, 365 days of 2011

Thursday, June 30th, 2011

Well it's Thursday and the last day of June. Why must summer go by so quickly. I was actually looking forward to summer vacation this year.  No more homework after work, time to lay by the pool and get tan. Here we are though, running through the first month like nobodys business. It's terrible!

We've lotsa plans already for the weekend and I must say I'm looking forward to those. 

As of right now I'm lost in a conflict with how to handle certain situations. One of my dearest and oldest friends is suffering from anxiety and depression and I feel absolutely useless in trying to talk him down. I've no idea what to say and no clue as to whats best to even say. It's rough. I'm waiting on friends with experience to assist me in helping him out. I don't know that he is seeking help or what he's doing. I'm just lost. 

Umph!  It's late and I'm exhausted mentally with worry.  It's time for me to wrap this up and hit the bed. I hope you enjoyed the Thursdays Monkey Butt. Always great times!  Goodnight folks!



Thursday's Monkey 'butt'

Well happy Thursday Monkey Butts!  ha ha... That's not a good one!  This weeks posting is brought to you by THIS GUY. I've tweeted him for a few weeks now so if you haven't checked it out yet, get to it damn it!

(photo taken here)
All that being said, lets move on, shall we?

****

A tourist walked into a pet shop and was looking at the animals on display. While he was there, another customer walked in and said to the shopkeeper, "I'll have an AutoCAD monkey please." The shopkeeper nodded, went over to a cage at the side of the shop and took out a monkey. He fitted a collar and leash, handed it to the customer, saying, "That'll be $5000." The customer paid and walked out with his monkey.

Startled, the tourist went over to the shopkeeper and said, "That was a very expensive monkey.  Most of them are only few hundred dollars. Why did that one cost so much?"

The Shopkeeper answered, "Ah, that monkey can draw in AutoCAD - very fast, clear layouts, no mistakes, well worth the money."

The tourist looked at a monkey in another cage. "That one's even more expensive! $10,000! What does it do?"

"Oh, that one's a Design monkey; it can design systems, layout projects, mark-up drawings, write specifications, some even calculate. All the really useful stuff," said the shopkeeper.

The tourist looked around for a little longer and saw a third monkey in its own cage. The price tag around its neck read $50,000. He gasped to the shopkeeper, "That one costs more than all the others put together! What on earth does it do?"

The shopkeeper replied, "Well, I haven't actually seen it do anything, but it says it's a Manager!"

****
original post can be found here
(I'm just so linkable today aren't I?)

Sadly, I had no idea what the hell an AutoCad was until after googling it, still am unsure to be honest with you, but whatevs. It's a Monkey joke and I attached a cute monkey picture to go with it!  Enjoy! I must say I'd rather enjoy that manager position (not doing anything) Must be nice!

Day 172 & 173, 365 days of 2011

Tuesday, June 28th, 2011

nothing spectacular to post about on Tuesday I guess. I went to bed without once opening my laptop and playing online.  Did not have the opportunity to get online at work either. BLAH!  Oh well. 

Wednesday, June 29th 2011

Work stayed busy yet again, thought for sure I'd taken a photo at work, to avoid such crapness I get in this mediocre lighting we have here.  ha ha.  But sadly I didn't, I'm stuck with this one, the best I could get. Or the best I wanted to take time to get. 

Today as you saw I had a moment, well a lot of moments to play online. I got some more reading down and beat my head on the desk while desperately exhausting the search engines for rental properties.  Blah!  Now I'm off to get some more sleep, right after this bowl of cereal.  Have an awesome Thursday and get excited for tomorrows Monkey Butt! 

Goodnight.

Shittastic you say?! Awesome!

(photo taken here)

Well isn't this shittastic!  Yes!  It's SHIT-TAS-TIC. I've never really given much thought as to how fucking  hard it is to get out there, on your own and support your 7 year old Pokey. I'm discovering now it's fucking bullshit. There is nothing within my price range and if it is then it's a big pile of shit hell hole.

This is my nightmare. I'm giving up for the day to avoid going postal.  Fuck off you stupid interwebz and apartment finders and craigslist.  That thing freaks me out.

I saw a few basements for rent that scared the hello out of me.  Ugh.... 

Yup. It's a shittastic day. Did I tell you I'd been waiting on Karma to take a bite out of my arse? Yea. Here she is telling me how it is. Thanks a lot BITCH! 

Day 171, 365 days of 2011

Monday, June 27th, 2011

Happy Monday?  Is it ever?  The weekends aren't long enough and I have a tendency to pack them full of everything that I can possibly imagine!  But it's awesome!  Today I was reminded I need to get my shit together and organized as well as financially stable enough to get myself out of here!  Ugh!  I did however stumble upon what may be an affordable apartment in a city close to where I moved from.  The location should be convienient enough where I can enroll Pokey into a school that will be a better fit for her *fingers crossed*. Now to buckle down and get myself in line.  Pull out the calculator and act like the grown up I'm posta be.  Glorious!

On a random note. I made speghetti tacos tonight ,all credit goes to the lovely show, iCarly.  They were kinda...AWESOME!  Strange combination but still tasty!  Go ahead.  Try it, let me know what you think.  How do you make it you say?  It's easy. Cook speghetti and warm the taco shells! But in case that isn't simple enough lets see if I can find a link for you! 

Goodnight folks! Enjoy the speghetti  tacos!    Oh and check out my new post http://uncelebratedwench.blogspot.com/2011/06/lets-all-welcome-ms-teeray.html 

365 days of 2011

Happy Sunday folks!  I had an awesome weekend and hung out with awesome people every day!  I'm glad for that. The weather had it's ups and downs and plans came and went and changed and changed some more. Now I sit here, excited about the True Blood premier coming on tonight. I'm trying to wrap up my net use so that while it's on, I can devote my full attention :) 

So lets get this party started. I took an unexpected vacation from the Internet this weekend. I'm glad I had the chance and it wasn't even planned. 

Friday, June 24th, 2011

Worked sucked!  Are you surprised?!  I'm not. Its a never ending cycle.  But I guess it's better than not having a job!  Go figure! 

That aside, some plans changed suddenly when my aunt begged me to tag along for her birthday celebration, I gave in and committed.  It was an awesome time with some of my crazy ole family.  Good times.  It's funny to watch your aunts celebrate and as my  cousin and I pointed and laughed at their dancing and craziness. we also pointed and laughed at ourselves for failing miserably at a game of pool where t he pool table constantly ate the cue ball. So is it a Q ball or a Cue ball?  Or am I wrong both ways. THE WHITE BALL.  That's the one *winks*!  The new corset which I absolutely adore was an iffy idea. It kinda hurts!  That's not saying I'd never wear  it again, because I'm actually looking forward to wearing it again!

Saturday, June 25th, 2011

(Another late night, haha. Not that I'm complaining!) 

I spent Saturday with an awesome friend, he asked me to ride along with him to some place called Carrollton. There is a pretty neat Z car place out there and wowza he is a talker. He spent at least an hour chatting with the Z car people and appeared as though he was enjoying it. Luckily a few people began texting me and kept me distracted from all the Z car chatter.  Nice cars I might add, but lawdy he scared the hellos outta me with his fast driving.  haha. I'm old I think?!!  Oh wells. That's normal right?

We called it a day when we made it back to his place and I raced my way to Athens to meet up with a few awesome lady friends. we had a blast chatting over dinner and then went off to Athfest.  Attended an event called "Wired" with electronic music and hung around there for a while, my cousin showed up. It was an awesome time. Went home earlyish and hit the bed. 2 late nights is not good for me.  Slept till 12pm!  Unusual for me!

Sunday, June 26th, 2011

(Sunday?  That's today. Here comes the bad weather!)

Spent time at the pool, the clouds got in the way of that. I'm not exactly pleased that weekends don't ever seem to last long enough these days, but glad that Pokey will be back home tomorrow. We're having spaghetti tacos (idea from iCarly) and will definitely let you know how tasty (or not) they are!  It should be interesting to say the least!  Now I'm waiting for the True Blood premier and it's going to be AWESOME! 

Have a great night readers, followers and fellow bloggers. Shall see you tomorrow and hope you have  a great night and Monday!  :)

Crazy little thing called love

(photo taken here, short but interesting read)

Jealousy is no more than feeling alone against smiling enemies.  ~Elizabeth Bowen

I've come to the realization that I may be slipping out of the fantasy idea I've been holding on to in regards to love. I get sucked into non fictional bullshit that I see on television with hopes that True Love exists.  I'm sure that it does, for some people. I know there are people who go in and out of love situations and run into them head first.  Bound and determined to Love with everything that is them! I myself, am incapable of doing so.  I can't see the silver lining. I cant unleash my heart to love and care for a significant other.

Through my 29 years of life, I've trampled on several hearts. It hurts me to have done so. I genuinely hate that I am this way. It's something that remains unchanged. I'm lost as to why I lock myself down and refuse to LOVE endlessly and whole hearted. On the flip side I find it comforting to know my heart will remain unbroken.

Once upon a time in another life. I fell in love. I loved and loved and loved. Making few mistakes along the adventure.  For a very long time, nothing swayed my feelings. No one else turned my head. There was no one else. Call it a child hood adoration or what have you. It was what it was. I was in love. Granted it was the childlike LOVE we all have known before. Never once did I imagine what it might be like to actually grow old with this boy. Time came and went and then the shit storm set in. It all crashed in front of my eyes. There was tears upon tears, tissues piled upon tissues and my heart, life and love was shattered.  

To say it the only way I can, this upsetting lost love set up a tangled web of mess for what is to be called my love life.  Rebound after rebound, I found happiness only within myself.  Happy to have if nothing else, just ME. I enjoyed the company of many a person after said events and eventually found myself in committed relationship after committed relationship, losing sight of all the happiness I had for me.  Time lost and loves lost, hearts broken and many tears fallen.  I've never felt the way I felt back then. I've never had my heart stomped and tossed out to die again. I don't want to feel that loss again. I don't want to cry broken hearted and alone, to face myself asking why I was so stupid to let it happen again!  

I get lost in panavision these days, watching love story after love story asking myself, 'I wonder if there is ever a person for me to LOVE like that again. If there will ever be a point in my life where I can be strong enough or weak enough to just let go and say OK.' One song here lately just makes me melt, makes me go awes, I can only vaguely remember the time in my life where I think I could feel even a little bit like that!  Even still, not quite!   It's just not in the cards for me I think. Love that is.  I find myself attracting all sorts of things in this lifetime and yet all I can do is just say, Oh please just let them understand. For what it's worth, I am so sorry for that which will probably happen. Please understand it's just WHO I AM!  I'm burning bridges along the way and will sadly end up with nothing left but ME.  

Why doesn't this bother me?    That's simple, because deep down I know, it's all ME!