What I'm Loving Wednesday

Happy Wednesday Dingleberries, 

Here it is about 3:15 pm on this cloudy Wednesday here in the great big state of Georgia.  Don't get confused now, I don't want to say Georgia is either GREAT or BIG. It just fit nicely there in the sentence. Don't you agree? 

So it's been a week or so since I've done anything for What I'm Loving Wednesday. So today I felt the bug, I decided it was time. Time to get back to it, it may not be anything blogworthy, but it's an attempt. On my part, to remind myself that there are still plenty of other things for me to love.  

So welcome back Dingleberries and join me for a What I'm Loving Wednesday. 

Don't forget, I'm linking up with Jamie over at Little Daisy May, go check her out!   She and her hubs have just welcomed an adorable addition to their sweet family. So a shout out congrats to them from the land of MB.

I'm loving...  How lucky I am to be oh so lucky to have some of the best friends, family and blogofamily there is out there. Ya know we lost Mama MB. I wouldn't be here right now if it weren't for you all. Don't think you've seen the end of my depressing, please just shoot yourself in the face and get it over with posts, but I'm working on that demon because Mama MB would want me to keep my tail up! 

I'm Loving... The holiday season is near, things are going to weird this year, of course. But I'm hopeful for somewhat of a happy season. Fingers crossed.

I'm Loving... I made it to the recorders court yesterday and was able to file a continuance on the speeding  ticket I got last month. It isn't due today, instead they've moved it to Jan 2nd. Go figure, but it gets me through the holiday....

I'm Loving...  We've a Christmas party we're planning to attend this Saturday, it's been a minute since we got out anywhere, hoping it will be fun!

I'm Loving....  The beautiful sunrise I see each day that Mama MB would have loved

Almost done..

I'm Loving... These potential boy names ... Dorian Archer and Jordan Westley. Though I've been thinking today about Dorian Eastley or Easton and/or Dorian Asher. 

Girl name has already been chosen. Rebecca Kylene.

And of course

I'm Loving this guy, too cute

Hang in there! 

My friends,

Dear Dingleberries,

I wanted to take a few moments and thank you all for being around. I know it's a very big world out there and we're all spread in our corners of it.  But you all seem to make it much much smaller a world. I hope that one day, in my future, in all of our futures that we are able to travel to the corners of the world and meet up with some of those we're calling best friends.  Don't think of me as lame, because I think it's sweet. And honestly, there is nothing more I'd like than to visit your part of our world, look in your face and give you a big hug.

For all the times you've helped me here in the blogosphere. For all of the kind words that you've left in my comment sections.

I'm glad you're all here, that you've pinched your nose and learned to love the poo smelling world of Monkey Butt.  Friends are hard to come by, especially for me.  I'm thankful for each and everyone of you.  You're all as close in my heart as the family I call my own.  You're all my family as well.

With Love, 

Monkey Butt 

Damn these Mondays...

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I had a rough start to this morning. I don't know why, just life and a bump in the road I assume.  It started great with Pokey though. It really did, she wasn't pissy or mean, no yelling, kicking or spitting. A wonderful little happy monkey this morning. I was really genuinely happy.

On the way to work I started thinking, I've been doing that some here lately.  Time to blow the dust off the old brain I guess. Get some things to moving, because it's been a while.   Since I've really thought about anything.

Mama Monkey Butt said the cancer was/is killing her. She said this to me on Saturday and though I wasn't strong enough to hold back the tears. To not let her see me cry, because she doesn't need that. She needs me to be strong, she doesn't need to worry about me falling apart. I can't fall apart, I'm her inspiration to keep on pushing.  Because no matter what she thinks, or wants to think.  She can beat this.  I think.  I know it's going to take more than  just me saying so though.  She has to believe it as well.  I think I hope she knows she can beat this.  Defy her God and all of science and take this bitch down like no one's business!  It can and will happen.

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So I've done a lot of soul searching over the weekend and it pains me to see and realize just how far my friends and I have grown apart. Though were we ever really that close to begin with?  As some of you know, I started blogging, because I'd walked into a room of friends who were talking about me. (READ MORE HERE) Talking together about some things I'd been saying to them. Now I've never confronted them and don't ever intend on doing so, because it is what it is. I've done the same thing, far worse I'm sure.  I don't know what exactly was said before I walked into the room, but none of that matters. It just means I started talking to all of you about some of my problems instead of sharing them with my friends. It really is a move to protect myself really, to protect me from those who can hurt me. As you all know, I most likely will never walk into a room full of you guys and gals talking smack about the Monkey Butt!  Right?  Ya know I fling poo, so it would be on like some pop cone!  Just sayin'!

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So I've sheltered myself back in and still refuse to speak out.  I did say something other day, because honestly I felt deeply insulted and offended by the lack of invitation lately.  It's like no one wants me around anyway.  Then when I try and prove my point it's just blown off, I then feel like I'm just there because I made a stink about it. Like deep down they don't want me there, it was just an invitation out of .... what?  I don't know. I'm butt hurt about it and when it all boils down. I don't think there is much left to save anyway. Perhaps there never was.

Should I be sad?  I don't think I can, because honestly, I never see them just as I may never meet all of you. But you guys and gals are much better friends than those I live next door too. Just goes to show, what you find in the world. We aren't all wacked out messes who could care less about those they should love and or care about.  You Dingleberries are much better friends than most of those I've called friends for upwards of  ten years.  I think perhaps I've come to a crossroads in life and I must start weeding out those who just aren't a good fit for me anymore.

Getting old is weird.... Isn't it? This is my thoughts here lately, I blogged about them recently as well, some of you may remember.  If not, welcome to my messed up world.  

Hang in there!