My mother died suddenly in July at the age of 84. I don't know which would be easier...or harder, I guess I should say. Sometimes I miss her so much, I can't breathe. I had so many questions I still wanted to ask her, so I've been talking my dad's ear off with questions!
I come up with something new I want to ask her, EVERY SINGLE DAY. And I can't! It really hurts and bless my Dad, I love him to death, but he just doesn't have the answers. It seriously makes like unfair!
Even though it's been 31 years, I still miss my mom something fierce. While that may sound depressing (i.e., the hurt lasts forever), I prefer to think that means she's always in my heart. And that makes me feel good. Although I know that, were she still alive, she would ask me, "And you thought that sitting on a toilet on the curb was a GOOD idea? What the hell is wrong with you?" :-)
AWe that's not depressing, I agree. I think it means they're still there. I expect to miss her for the rest of my life. It's just what it is. Unless of course I forget who I am or something... Where am I again?
I am almost as old now as my Mom was when she passed. Would I take her back? Sure. But time has moved on. I would have a lot of learning to do about her now that I am of an age to understand, and she'd sure have a few things to learn about me. I like us the way we were.
I wish I had more time with her. If only I'd known... If only right? She knew, and she didn't want to be treated differently. I wish she'd told me, I wouldn't have treated her different, but I'd never left her side .... EVER.
My mother died suddenly in July at the age of 84. I don't know which would be easier...or harder, I guess I should say. Sometimes I miss her so much, I can't breathe. I had so many questions I still wanted to ask her, so I've been talking my dad's ear off with questions!
ReplyDeleteI come up with something new I want to ask her, EVERY SINGLE DAY. And I can't! It really hurts and bless my Dad, I love him to death, but he just doesn't have the answers. It seriously makes like unfair!
DeleteSorry to hear you're missing your mom today. But feel free to borrow my mother anytime. No rush returning her.
ReplyDeleteAwwww. Thanks Stephen, I read your stories about Mom. I know she's awesome too!
DeleteEven though it's been 31 years, I still miss my mom something fierce. While that may sound depressing (i.e., the hurt lasts forever), I prefer to think that means she's always in my heart. And that makes me feel good.
ReplyDeleteAlthough I know that, were she still alive, she would ask me, "And you thought that sitting on a toilet on the curb was a GOOD idea? What the hell is wrong with you?"
:-)
AWe that's not depressing, I agree. I think it means they're still there. I expect to miss her for the rest of my life. It's just what it is. Unless of course I forget who I am or something... Where am I again?
Deletehaha.. You're Mom sounds awesome!!
I am almost as old now as my Mom was when she passed. Would I take her back? Sure. But time has moved on. I would have a lot of learning to do about her now that I am of an age to understand, and she'd sure have a few things to learn about me. I like us the way we were.
ReplyDeleteI wish I had more time with her. If only I'd known... If only right? She knew, and she didn't want to be treated differently. I wish she'd told me, I wouldn't have treated her different, but I'd never left her side .... EVER.
DeleteI am sorry for your loss. Sucks, really does.
ReplyDeleteThank you :)
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